MY DVD IS STUCK IN MY DRIVE!!!!!! I have tried everything!!!

- Waiting 10 minutes... waiting 30 minutes
- using drutil in the terminal window
- rebooting holding down the eject key
- rebooting holding down the trackpad button
- trying to eject the CD with the MBP upside down
- trying to eject the CD with the superdrive pointed down and shaking it, WHY THE F#*&% AM I SHAKING MY LAPTOP THAT COST MORE THAN MY FIRST CAR?!?!?

I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING!!!! This is the third problem I have had with my nearly $3k laptop in less than a year. F^%&$ APPLE!!! When I get AppleCare on the line tomorrow I am going to rip them a new one. THOSE *&^$%!!!! WHAT THE F#*#(@!!! Why won't this just let me F#%$* DVD eject!

Jake: Wouldn't it be funny if I just spent the last three hours trying to get this disc out and realized I hadn't even put it in there in the first place?
Me: Not really
Jake: Oh (hysterically laughing for like 10 minutes straight)
Me: You didn't. That's what you get for watching Friends you fruitball.

True story. I just got off the phone with my brother after going through all of this only to have him laugh uncontrollably when he realized he had never put his Season 4 Friends disc in his MBP.

Thought I should share as we used every method in this thread to try and get said disc out.

Cheers!