Here's a simple solution ... with your display attached, set your preffered resolution using the System Preferences pane. Once that's done, open the Terminal and lock the preference file (com.apple.windowserver.plist file) by typing:
% sudo chflags uchg /Library/Preferences/com.apple.windowserver.plistIf you want to make changes to your display settings at a later date, you'll have to unlock the file using sudo chflags nouchg... instead of uchg.
Happy remote restarting!

